Dear dating girl

Posted by / 06-Apr-2020 21:01

I started seriously dating again and eventually got introduced to another guy whom my friend at the time felt could curb my ‘stubborn ways’.

The day we met for the first time, I didn’t have his time, because there was this guy I had been eyeing and by some stroke of luck, he asked if we could go outside to talk, away from people.

I shouldn’t have waited months before being open to date other guys again. I got caught up in the excitement of him that I didn’t even realize that it looked like he had money, but there was really no money.

The good English was picked up during a long stay abroad and he never even finished school.

But what really got me was how he wanted to be with me most of the time, and how he tried so hard to accommodate my party ways. I thought I was ‘woke’ and he would see that he could gist about other girls with me and also not have to affirm what I was to him.

He normally wouldn’t go to a club, but one day I was going with my friends like I usually do and he asked if he could come. I found myself in a situation where he could tell me he was going to Abuja to meet up with a girl and I would ‘hold the fort’ in Kaduna with tears in my heart. I had never dated a ‘big boy’ before, and with so much ‘connect’.

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I got home and they were all acting funny, called me to the room and asked me to sit. All those cute things we used to awww about became annoying. I would cry all night on Saturdaybut would make it to Church and answer ‘ya mijin ki?! At the time, I knew marriage was tough and I wasn’t naive to think all the couples I knew were perfect.

In my mind I kept thinking which family member was not at home because someone had definitely died. Before I was told Muazu misplaced 3 wristwatches on his way from the market. I never in the beginning thought it would end in a break up. I didn’t want to air my dirty laundry in public and when we made up, look a fool. But, everyone made it look so easy and I just believed mine had to be the worse. Twice I thought how nice it’d be to just sleep and never wake up.

And then they went on to say I shouldn’t be angry it wasn’t intentional bla bla bla. I bursted our laughing and the look on their faces made me ask if I was really that bad? They won’t agree, but I think they just had wedding jitters. I had also never seen my parents go through what I was going through so I further held everything inside. I immersed myself in my business and found some relief there, but every time it was time to go home, my heart sank. I am hammering on singles because you all still have a chance to not make the mistakes I made.

I became all sweet and sugar (argue with your keypad) and because I felt I had a good man, I made an effort to calm down my hot temper.

My family will tell you that while I was packing up to leave for ‘gidan aure’ I asked Muazu, who has worked with my family for almost 15 years, to go put batteries in all my wristwatches at Barnawa market.

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If Aunty D didn’t leave, where then did I get the audacity.

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