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If you can distinguish between the two and it’s nothing more than an urge for a wild boot-knocking, then stop right there because it’s definitely not worth it.For me, the whole ‘follow your heart’ or ‘the heart wants what the heart wants’ cliches should be thrown out the window here.The sheer concept of seeing one of my mates with an ex is something that’d affect me for a number of reasons.
Or, they may say that they wouldn’t be comfortable with it. And if your friend’s prerogative is a them-or-me ultimatum, you need to respect that too.
Historically, Girl Code Rule #2 is “Thou shalt not date the ex of her friend.” No matter how long it’s been or how short their romance.
This code is so hard-wired in the feminine psyche that a fourth grader knew it when asked to configure dates for four men and four women on a math test, and she cited the moral dilemma saying, “I can’t answer this problem because my mom says according to girl code you shouldn’t date a friends x boyfriend. What if you live in a town with a population of under five thousand?
On the flip side, it might also impact your relationship with your friend, depending on things like how they broke up, how long they dated, and whether or not they still harbor feelings for this person in question.
“You can date whomever you’d like, but it’s likely that you’ll want to consider your friend’s feelings too,” says sexologist Jess O’Reilly, Ph D.